I have been waking up rather early here (4 a.m. Utah time) and so I have to try to amuse myself for a while before I start to slowly annoy my husband awake. Annoying someone awake takes years of practice and a careful balance of different nuisances, so I don't recommend you try it without a professional present.
Anyway, once up and nourished, we made way to celebrate the morning with a canoe-ing trip down the coast. I have wanted to canoe since we arrived, but the waters have been too rough. But Christmas, the waters were like glass, and we donned out life vests and they sent us out. We were aboard one of the two-person plastic canoes that floats high in the water and maneuvers easily. My husband, whose back has actually been bothering him, laid back for a good portion of the ride and lived the real life of Jamaican pimp with his woman doing the work. This allowed me to indulge in fantasies of being a native guide on an early exploratory mission. And, it was an exploratory mission! Because while my goal was pretty lofty -- to reach a far jungle and rock outcropping quite a ways down the coast--we simultaneously came upon a nude beach. Yeah, W and I have apparently NOT been good kids this year, because for Christmas we were given a lot of naked middle aged people on a beach!
In the afternoon, we made our way aboard a beautiful 65 foot catamaran for a dinner cruise/Christmas party/ waterfall hike. The boat was absolutely beautiful and complete with open bar (once we had completed all dangerous activities) and constant live d.j. We nested ourselves into one of two woven sections of the stern while the boat cut through the water toward the waterfall.
When we arrived at the waterfall, we were told to 'create a human chain going boy-girl-boy-girl'. Which we didn't know how to do immediately. But soon, we realized that they wanted us to hold hands in our group of about twenty individuals. I thought that was kinda silly and rather uncomfortable since, inevitably, we are all holding hands with each other's spouses, but then, when I realized we were ascending straight up the face of the waterfall, I was grateful for the husband assigned to me. Of course, my husband, who was behind me, practically carried his new charge up the rocks, but what can you do?
Ascending a waterfall up it's face while water is pouring down upon you and you are struggling to find footholds on the rounded, worn, slope of the rock is exactly what you could never do in the US. Damn attorneys. And, it was soooo much fun. I wished it went on for hours. It was, however, the longest, climb-able water-fall in the world. Which makes me a little sad, because I wouldn't mind planning trips around that activity.
We descended by staircase.
And then, we re-boarded our boat for snorkeling, then a delicious buffet meal with lots of cooked veggies and then quite a bit of red-stripe, dance contests and drinking contests, and the ride home. W, of course, asked to see the engine room before we left. We have pictures if you are interested:).
I hope everyone had a beautiful Christmas. My love to all!
Saturday, December 26, 2009
Thursday, December 24, 2009
Candy - I mean, Coffee Mountain!
Today W and I biked down coffee mountain! This morning, we headed toward Portland, Jamaica by bus to see the coffee plantations on Blue Mountain in the south of Jamaica. The bus ride allowed us to see the country and enjoy the intense generosity of spirit of the Jamaicans whom we have encountered. Once in Portland Parish, we began a steady incline toward the top of the 7,000 foot peak. The bus was as optimistically driven as any we have experienced in Asia or Central America. The road was only wide enough for one vehicle in many places, with precipitous ravines and constantly decaying slopes. Our driver, Cleeve, faithfully delivered us to the top, where we feasted upon coffee and thick donut like balls of deep fried goodness. The coffee was worth the risk of life and limb. Then we all mounted heavy, beach-style, cruisers that had both very poor breaking ability and an elegant dusting of rust. They were comfortable, however, and more than accomplished their task of delivering us down the winding roads to the waterfall at the bottom.
I'm unsure if we have ever encountered such extraordinarily kind and helpful people before (at least the men; the women still live under a strict code of pouty grumpiness).
We had a beautiful day which culminated in a cold and exhilarating swim in a waterfall -- we could swim to the wall, grasp the rock to slide our bodies behind the fall, and then push off and shoot out of the water. Very fun. Even though my toe came out of the socket as it likes to do under stress, it was very very fun.
I hope everyone is enjoying their Christmas Eve. My love to all and my thanks for your generous time reading this blog.
I'm unsure if we have ever encountered such extraordinarily kind and helpful people before (at least the men; the women still live under a strict code of pouty grumpiness).
We had a beautiful day which culminated in a cold and exhilarating swim in a waterfall -- we could swim to the wall, grasp the rock to slide our bodies behind the fall, and then push off and shoot out of the water. Very fun. Even though my toe came out of the socket as it likes to do under stress, it was very very fun.
I hope everyone is enjoying their Christmas Eve. My love to all and my thanks for your generous time reading this blog.
Wednesday, December 23, 2009
Treading Water
I am so thankful for this break from reality and for the break in the clouds, today. It was beautiful. Sun and crashing waves. W and I spent the day swimming in the ocean, feeling the salt freedom that I miss so much in my months between seas.
I was afraid an all-inclusive resort would suck out my favorite parts of travel: the challenge of the unknown, finding secret beaches and hole-in-the-wall restaurants with the best food on earth, not knowing where we are going to sleep or how we are going to get there. But, luckily, here I can find my second-favorite part of travel: utter relaxation and salt water. The latter nearly makes up for the former. The latter, plus my husband, actually does make up for it.
We have been banned from going scuba diving due to my sweet Utah raised husband who marked 'recurrent back problems' on his dive release. I told him not to check yes to anything, because we would not be able to dive. But, apparently, W has begun to disregard my legal advise. It was pretty funny.
Anyway, so instead of diving, we are going biking down a mountain tomorrow and to a coffee plantation. I am sooo excited.
Love to all - thanks for taking the time to read my ramblings.
I was afraid an all-inclusive resort would suck out my favorite parts of travel: the challenge of the unknown, finding secret beaches and hole-in-the-wall restaurants with the best food on earth, not knowing where we are going to sleep or how we are going to get there. But, luckily, here I can find my second-favorite part of travel: utter relaxation and salt water. The latter nearly makes up for the former. The latter, plus my husband, actually does make up for it.
We have been banned from going scuba diving due to my sweet Utah raised husband who marked 'recurrent back problems' on his dive release. I told him not to check yes to anything, because we would not be able to dive. But, apparently, W has begun to disregard my legal advise. It was pretty funny.
Anyway, so instead of diving, we are going biking down a mountain tomorrow and to a coffee plantation. I am sooo excited.
Love to all - thanks for taking the time to read my ramblings.
Sun!
It is officially sunny here - beautiful blue skies and tiny wispy clouds high above. W and I already spent the morning in the ocean. We are going to go on a shallow dive this afternoon if we can.
However, my fears of a water landing appear not to have been too far fetched. During our heavy rain last night an AA plane skidded down the runway in Kingston Jamaica, injuring passengers. Luckily no one was killed, but the plane split open, allowing rain to pour in and the passengers smelled jet fuel. The plane came to a stop ten feet from the ocean.
However, my fears of a water landing appear not to have been too far fetched. During our heavy rain last night an AA plane skidded down the runway in Kingston Jamaica, injuring passengers. Luckily no one was killed, but the plane split open, allowing rain to pour in and the passengers smelled jet fuel. The plane came to a stop ten feet from the ocean.
So My Mom is Actually From Jamaica
Everyone sings here -- well the staff, at least. The staff constantly sings along to whatever music is playing on the background. Which, in Jamaica is usually random covers of brand new Beyonce and Rhianna songs put to a Reggae beat. Very funny. Anyway, everyone sings. Whether they are waiting for you to order a drink or helping you at the front desk, they sing to themselves. And, there is no tone-discrimination here on the island. Its like all-karaoke all the time.
Well, with the exception of a half hour last evening, it was rained without stop since my last post. I met a poor pale mid-westerner yesterday who confessed to me in the ladies bathroom that if she has to return to -10 degree weather in Michigan without a tan, that she will be broken hearted. I reminded her that she is on her honeymoon. There is no shame in staying indoors.
But, as I type, I hear birds! and where there are singing birds! there is a lack of rain! Which means we can go diving!!
Well, with the exception of a half hour last evening, it was rained without stop since my last post. I met a poor pale mid-westerner yesterday who confessed to me in the ladies bathroom that if she has to return to -10 degree weather in Michigan without a tan, that she will be broken hearted. I reminded her that she is on her honeymoon. There is no shame in staying indoors.
But, as I type, I hear birds! and where there are singing birds! there is a lack of rain! Which means we can go diving!!
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
..and getting caught in the rain
Did I mention that it has poured since we arrived here? Which, since I LOVE rain, isn't' really a bad thing for me. And I never get rain in Utah. We are either a hot desert or a cold snowy mountian town.
After drenching ourselves exloring the resort, we spent the day swimming and soaking in the pool and hot tubs while rather torrential rain poured down upon us. It was pretty cool. The pool was just a few dozen feet from the ocean, so we could watch the surf crash down in white shooting sprays upon the sand. We utilized one of the swim-up bars, but with the constant downpour, our drinks were quickly watered down.
And, after talking with a couple (honeymooners of course) who had spent eight (that's 8!) hours on the runway in their plane in Maryland, we no longer think twelve hours of travel is unreasonable from SLC to Jamaica. Apparently, the airline staff didn't serve any drinks to the passengers until six hours into the wait. The plane was snowed into the runway just feet from the gate. They sent trucks to tow the plane into place. Then the trucks got stuck in the runway too.
It looks like the rain in breaking up. Which is good, because I really need some vitamin D.
After drenching ourselves exloring the resort, we spent the day swimming and soaking in the pool and hot tubs while rather torrential rain poured down upon us. It was pretty cool. The pool was just a few dozen feet from the ocean, so we could watch the surf crash down in white shooting sprays upon the sand. We utilized one of the swim-up bars, but with the constant downpour, our drinks were quickly watered down.
And, after talking with a couple (honeymooners of course) who had spent eight (that's 8!) hours on the runway in their plane in Maryland, we no longer think twelve hours of travel is unreasonable from SLC to Jamaica. Apparently, the airline staff didn't serve any drinks to the passengers until six hours into the wait. The plane was snowed into the runway just feet from the gate. They sent trucks to tow the plane into place. Then the trucks got stuck in the runway too.
It looks like the rain in breaking up. Which is good, because I really need some vitamin D.
A Hostel for People with Money!
So, I've seen Sandals ads since I was a kid. And, it all looks very romantic in their commercials. And, actually, it is. But, it is also really really funny.
First, there are couples everywhere. And A LOT of people are on their honeymoon. Which is sweet. But also, honeymoons can be a little awkward for people who have never lived together.
Second, there are couples playing games everywhere. There are common areas with activities like billiards, and ping pong, and chess and checkers, etc. So far, W and I have realized that we no longer remember how to play checkers.
Third, the tourists are very friendly. And, despite Josh's warning to me, no one seems to be friendly because they are secretly swingers. Instead, we are surrounded with a lot of couples, our age-ish, who are really friendly.
Fourth, the male-staff members are extremely kind and gracious and helpful. They speak in the beautiful Jamaican dialect (and it seems that this is not just for show because I listen intently to them talk to each other). But the female-staff members are kinda grumpy. Okay: really grumpy. Which makes W try to make them smile with his ridiculous comments and jokes. Which only works on them some of the time.
Fifth, when red-stripe on tap is all-included, my husband gets tired by mid-day and requires a nap. Which is what he is doing. Which is why I am typing this.
Anyway, I am finally getting to the point of this post: after wandering around the resort with a bunch of friendly peers playing random games in the common areas, Willie realized: we are at a hostel for people with money! I might add: we are at a hostel for monogamous people with money! And, since we actually paid for this trip with AMEX points, I can't help but look everyone up and down and wonder: so how did you pay for this?
First, there are couples everywhere. And A LOT of people are on their honeymoon. Which is sweet. But also, honeymoons can be a little awkward for people who have never lived together.
Second, there are couples playing games everywhere. There are common areas with activities like billiards, and ping pong, and chess and checkers, etc. So far, W and I have realized that we no longer remember how to play checkers.
Third, the tourists are very friendly. And, despite Josh's warning to me, no one seems to be friendly because they are secretly swingers. Instead, we are surrounded with a lot of couples, our age-ish, who are really friendly.
Fourth, the male-staff members are extremely kind and gracious and helpful. They speak in the beautiful Jamaican dialect (and it seems that this is not just for show because I listen intently to them talk to each other). But the female-staff members are kinda grumpy. Okay: really grumpy. Which makes W try to make them smile with his ridiculous comments and jokes. Which only works on them some of the time.
Fifth, when red-stripe on tap is all-included, my husband gets tired by mid-day and requires a nap. Which is what he is doing. Which is why I am typing this.
Anyway, I am finally getting to the point of this post: after wandering around the resort with a bunch of friendly peers playing random games in the common areas, Willie realized: we are at a hostel for people with money! I might add: we are at a hostel for monogamous people with money! And, since we actually paid for this trip with AMEX points, I can't help but look everyone up and down and wonder: so how did you pay for this?
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